Here I will discuss all the topics of interest, the trials and tribulations of a full time DM/GM and the mountains and valleys we have to navigate as collaborative storytellers. This is my personal experience that I aim to share with the intention of helping future GM/DMs and players alike to better enjoy the amazing experience that is the lovely world of Dungeons and Dragons. My experience is a very specific one to be fair. I started playing D&D 3rd edition, dabbled in AD&D and then hopped on board the 3.5 edition ship and never disembarked. Now I am proud to say I have been a Dungeon Master for friends and family for over 25 years and hopefully will continue to do so until the day I leave this mortal realm. 

A recent post of mine got a whole lot of attention from the community at large and I was taken aback by the quality and variety of responses. So many creative DMs and players alike were kind enough to share their experiences. Below is the post and I expand on the feedback I received from the community and my personal thoughts on the matter.

"Magic Items play a major part of any D&D game. They are great to find, create and experiment with, but how do you handle loss? Losing a precious item can sometimes be devastating to a player, how is this handled or what experiences have you had as a player with the loss of a magic item?
>>A recent game had a player suffer a major loss. Not only was the weapon magical but it was also custom made. It was lost in heroic fashion but sunder is sunder and the result was a destroyed cherished item.<<".

The most common response was to create a quest to allow the player or character to salvage their precious item. I play pretty close to the RAW rules in my campaign and a sundered weapon is irreparable short of a very powerful spell (often far beyond the means of the characters). This means there is no bringing it back. A quest to gain another weapon or a replacement was certainly viable but in truth any quest will provide monetary rewards to help them afford to remake or rebuild the item so the nature of the quest doesn't really matter in the end.

Most of my players at that table are veterans of several campaigns. My observation is that many of them are far less attched to their weapons. Don't get me wrong I can hear and see the sting of the loss plain as day on theor faces, but it's nopt their first and won't be the last. The situation is so very different for the first loss of an item and isn;t that true of anything in real life as well? The first love lost, death of a friend or loved one, loss of a pet. They never get easy and each one hits us in a different way but (hopefully) we learn tricks to help us cope with the loss.

The methods to cope in a fantasy setting often mirror real life. If the loss feels random the acceptance is more difficult. As a game designer I try to make sure any loss in the game is meaningful, whether it's a character death, a familiar, animal companion, cherished NPC or a magic item. Suffering a loss in any way in the defense of the innocent or pursuit of justice can be much easier to swallow (the heroic death). Having a minotaur sunder a family heirloom might well mandate that the character reforge the weapon and restore it to it's former glory, in this case a quest is the path to recovery for certain.

Having a funeral, burial or wake works for living creatures but items aren't held in reverence by the other members, it's a far more personal experience. I often encourage the players to keep the raw materials and forge them into the replacement, in a way this allows a once trusty weapon or item to "live" again in its new form and continue its storied existence alongside the player.

Another common response was "It's a game, a pretend weapon and if you can break the enemies weapons then buckle up cause they can do it to you!". The suck it up mentality at the fore here. In a roleplaying game it's very normal that we (as players) develop attachment to our things and honestly its a great part of roleplay, but in a realistic world setting a player should be mentally prepared to face loss in all shapes. Giving a player a moment to mourn the loss isn't always an option in the moment but ensure that they have time to process it as soon as is reasonable. Exceptions of course exist and any player really traumatized should be allowed to walk away from the table for 5 minutes to collect themselves and only very rarely have I had to stop a session due to a very animated reaction to the loss of a valued magic item.

Keeping the focus on fun and forward movement is the only way to play this amazing game. The "Yes and" method always pays dividends. Once a player has cooled and is ready to continue we do so, but I have seen  the destruction of an item create a a self destructive tantrum that potentially would have led to a TPK. I don't let play continue at that point and suspend play until cooler heads prevail. People are going to people (one of my favourite quotes)  and we can't remove the human element from the game so be ready to roll with some punches and try to show empathy as much as possible. Share the grief, share the outrage and when ready carry on.

That said if you are signing up for a realistic world setting experience, be ready for it. This highlights the importance of a solid session zero that clearly informs the potential players of what to expect at your table, but that's a topic for another day :).

Town Name: Size (population)

Gold Piece (GP) limit: amount (based on size)

Population: breakdown by percent (%) (races, average family size)

-          Details

-          Details

Territory: (who controls/protects or owns the land and what does it border):

-          EX. Human controlled territory bordering Elven kingdom.

-          EX. Under the Dominion or Protection of Lord Evan Gilmsbry (LN) (City of Breize).

Power Center (Type): Standard, Non standard, Monstrous):

-          Standard would be a lawmaker or appointed person or persons,

-          Non standard may be something like the thieves guild or a cabal of mages are the ones who truly hold power despite there being a mayor or elected official

-          Monstrous could be a dragon reigning over the town demanding tribute or a beholder lurking beneath the streets controlling day to day activities of the people above

Description: What do people see and hear. It is important to remember that the players are not the DM and they have no way of knowing certain things at a glance. Avoid going into too much detail and allow a few sentences of description lead the players into areas or places where you can embellish more as your players interest.

Your description should convey certain information to the player that is important to your setting. Information like industry, purpose, vibe are most important.

-          A lumber town might smell of sawdust or pulp, you may hear the sounds of the mill in the distance or chopping

-          Are their craftsmen or is it a simple village of farmers. The sounds of tools, smell of manure and the sounds of the animals being raised should be the hints without saying “It’s a farming town”.

Features: This section describes the features that draw the eye or player interest and make this town unique. Example include architecture, building materials, colours, greenery, fauna and flora, tended lawns, debris and rubble, trash or detritus, sagging rooves on disrepair or pristine cathedrals, well groomed roads or dirt paths, the sounds of music or violence.

These can be anything and as the DM it’s your role to make these places appealing and attractive to the players in some way. You can create a pull for these elements by putting important NPC’s there, causing a commotion or including a commodity that they need as an easy pull, but how rewarding is it when they explore a place based on your fantastical description to discover its beauty and then while exploring discover the NPC they had been looking for all along?

People: The general population, race, garb and mood of the populace should tell a story all of their own without the need to give the player information they wouldn’t have access to. Dirty or torn clothes vs clean and well kept, a depressed or aggressive populace vs an inviting and happy populace, reserved or outgoing persons, shunning or welcoming outsiders, bright coloured garb or very little to no clothes, hair styles, modes of travel (carriage, Pegasus or on foot or magic). All of these elements paint a picture for the players without telling them information that they do not have access to.

EX. If we describe the populace as being poor, what does that mean? Maybe they are just dirty from their jobs at the mine but are in fact well paid. How do you show both?

Town Purpose: What purpose does the town serve in the kingdom or to other towns. Do they gather resources, are they independent and separate from society, do they breed the rarest horses in the kingdom, provide delicious foods or staple foodstuffs like corn and wheat, renown smiths working their steel, maybe a trade hub or military base?

All of these questions and more are crucial to developing a realistic feel to each of your towns. Not every place has an inn. A farming community would be unlikely to have an inn for travellers as they would make no money. Think about what purpose your town serves to estimate its size and the amount of wealth and services available to the NPCs and the players alike to help shape a more realistic economy.

Buildings/Places of Interest: A comprehensive list of all locations available for exploration, as a personal touch I always make sure to leave more than a few buildings for ad hoc creative moments. You may need to add a feature or NPC on the fly and having a building already open and unused gives you the space to be creative and spontaneous.

A good question to ask for this section is about infrastructure. What buildings or services should be available in the town with the population and purpose for the village that you have designed? Elements like a town hall for meetings, a prison, a granary, well, markets or pavilions, theatre, law makers offices, headquarters for members of state or government, shops, churches, sewer systems and many other elements that comprise your settlement.

Add a little flavour to the building or place by describing what an average member of the populace would say about it.

EX. Town Hall: An impressive and long log building is weathered but the structure is well maintained. The hall houses the court for town meetings and can be used as a shelter in case of raids or emergencies. A detention center beneath the town hall can easily hold 25 inmates comfortably or 50 at maximum capacity and doubles as a shelter. The detention center is often used as storage space for the town as crime has hit an all time low.

-          Many criminals claim this is the “nicest place to be locked up”.

NPC’s: List the NPC’s that are commonly found in this location. You can even go so far as to write a schedule for the building which may help you decide who is present at a given hour. This is a good opportunity to embellish on the details of your world. During the day a building or store might have the owner, employees or a manager or member of state. During the evening perhaps the shop is abandoned and locked up with the owner living above or beside, or perhaps they hire guards to sit and watch the stock. Having a name for the guard and the schedule made will help your players plan their activities without you needing to surprise them with a details that they would have likely known had you described it well to begin with.

EX. While casing a store for a theft the players might see a guard arrive to replace the day shift guard and go inside, never leaving the building as the owner locks up and boards the windows. A shop owner might want to be more sneaky about catching potential thieves but having a visible guard is meant to deter thievery from happening to begin with, consider the owners motivations.

Shops: Here a comprehensive list of all shops, NPC’s and services as well as any quests available to the players. Here we can include a link to the NPC in another document or include the NPC here in the section. Whatever the method the info you need should be a click away. Having all of the information in front of you when the players are in the building will streamline the roleplay and ensure you don’t go digging around for extra info.

EX. Eliza Cartright’s Wonderful Wagons and Carriages (GP limit +250 personal wealth)

-          Crafts the most elegant and luxurious carriages. No lord of lady shows up to court in anything else. She is backordered for a full year.

Places of Interest:

EX. Heroes Rest Graveyard (DC 16 Gather Info to discover the nature of the name)

-          A beautiful and well-kept graveyard, tended to by the last surviving member of the band of Heros known as “Viktor's Victors”.

Heroes Rest Mansion

-          Viktor Terringer and his manservant Aldo Abenmoore inhabit the home. It has fallen into disrepair as the two are nearing the end of their lives. Despite Aldos constant prompting that another servant would make the place what it once was as well as improve his masters quality of life, Viktor wants to die in peace without the trouble of a new hire.

Factions: What factions (if you include those in your setting) have a presence in the settlement? Do they have a vested interest in developing or thwarting the progress of the town or its people. This is where the DM gets to work behind the scenes. This information may not be readily available to Players or even most of the general populace. Having it prepared will add a depth to your world building that allows players to delve deeply into your lore and prepare you for any surprise twists or provide a few of your own.

EX. Knowing the inn is secretly run by a cult or thieves guild might mean a typical barfight could result in more dire or interesting consequences that pull or introduce your players to a previously unknown element in your campaign without needing to simply role a gather info check.

NPCs: This section describes the NPC’s briefly with a short description of their appearance and habits. I include a hyperlink to the compendium of NPC’s that I created for ease of use but you could easily include the entire NPC character sheet here as well as all of the relevant information for running them including voice clips and image(s).

EX. NPC: Name (Alignment), (Faction membership(s)), Race, Description (Age, Sex, Build, Hair, Height, Weight)

Lord Evan Gilmsbry (LN) (Nobility, Order of the Brightlance), Human (venerable,

Quests: A list of quests available in the town. Include the Quest Giver (Person, PLace, Thing) and the location they can be found (may be multiple in the case of a person who follows a schedule or several points to grab a quest like a quest board).

Law: Include the laws or amendments/changes to law in the town. I use a set of standard laws for each kingdom to provide a strong base for players to understand the ramifications of their actions.
EX. Town uses the standard Laws of the realm, town uses standard laws but treat thieves more harshly, treat outsiders or foreigners differently etc.